Sunday, August 5, 2007

Turnoffs for Guys and Gals







Been having trouble lately in the dating world? Maybe the answer is to learn the top 10 turnoffs that make great gals wave goodbye. If any of these fictional guys sound like you, it's time to change your approach.

Great Gal Turnoff #1: Showboat Sammy- Maybe he owns a yacht off the coast of France. Maybe he has a timeshare in the Hamptons. Maybe his annual bonus is bigger than most guys' salaries. That's all well and good, but does it really need to be divulged on the first date?

Great Gal Turnoff #2: Messy Melvin- A-list celebrities can pull off the unkempt look. First-daters need to pay attention to shaving, clothing and bad breath. If the guy can't even put in the effort for a first impression, it doesn't bode well down the road.

Great Gal Turnoff #3: Rude Randal- "Where's our drinks, lady?" If a guy treats the service staff with a lack of respect, a great gal will likely assume he'll do the same to her someday. The last thing anyone wants is to be talked down to or disrespected.

Great Gal Turnoff #4: Cheapie Charlie- There will always be debate about who should pay on a first date. Some guys are traditionalists and want to foot the bill; others expect a 50-50 monetary split. In most cases, offering to pay is the way to go. Let her pick up the tab on a future date.

Great Gal Turnoff #5: Still-Married Michael- Marriage, separation and divorce are pretty cut-and-dry terms. If a guy says he's separated when he really means he's cheating on his wife, it's going to cause trouble. Be honest from the get-go and let the dating chips fall where they may.

Great Gal Turnoff #6: Hands-On Howie- Guys need to read the signals before assuming hand holding, massaging and other touchy-feely activities have the green light. Jumping too quickly to any form of intimacy can make any guy seem too aggressive.

Great Gal Turnoff #7: Stereotyping Stephen- "Oh, you're one of those types of women." Jumping to conclusions about a date from the way she answers one or two questions is a definite mistake. Let the date unfold before making assumptions about someone you just met.

Great Gal Turnoff #8: Distracted David- His cell phone is ringing constantly, he's popping away from the table every 10 minutes, and he keeps interrupting the conversation flow. First dates require focused attention -- that means putting the phone on vibrate, making eye contact and being present.

Great Gal Turnoff #9: All-Business Barry- Some guys are great salesmen or outstanding negotiators. But there's a time and place for business and a time and place for leisure. Guys who treat first dates like business transactions will never close the deal.

Great Gal Turnoff #10: Nervous Ned- He can't sit still, he's banging his fork on the table, and he won't make eye contact for more than three seconds. Nervous antics are a real turnoff and make a great gal think a guy has something to hide. Work out the nervous kinks before the date starts.

Now the guys turn...
10 Turnoffs That Make Good Guys Wave Goodbye
Where did you go wrong? How could you have misunderstood what you thought was great chemistry? Maybe it's time you learned the top 10 turnoffs that make good guys wave goodbye. If any of these fictional female daters sound like you, it's time for a first-date makeover.

1.Misleading Maggie: Her profile says no kids, athletic and raking in the big bucks. The first date reveals two young kids, an extended waistline and unemployment checks. Nothing says trust issues for a guy more than lies from the get-go.

2.Insecure Ilene: She reads into every comment a guy makes. She wants to know right away if date #2 can be tomorrow. She asks you to call the minute you get home. This clingy nature screams of a potential needy girlfriend lacking independence.

3.Third-Degree Donna: The cross-examination begins before the menus arrive. The questions are coming fast and furious, and the guy begins to feel like the defendant on the stand in a criminal trial. If a guy feels stuck under the interrogation lights, he'll run for the hills.

4.Tardy Tina: She arrives late, she no-shows, she changes plans last-minute, she loses his number, she flat-out just doesn't respect a guy's time. Fashionably late is one thing; keeping a guy waiting 30 minutes or no-showing is unacceptable.

5.High-Maintenance Hilda: "Thanks for taking me to this nice restaurant, but couldn't you get a table by the window?" The feeling that nothing is ever good enough makes a guy quit trying to impress. A simple thank you for a nice dinner is a better way to go.



6.Chatterbox Charlene: The conversation doesn't have to be 50 percent talking and 50 percent listening, but if she does all the talking it feels more like a seminar than a date. Charlene's opposite cousin, Pulling Teeth Patricia, is equally unsettling, making the guy do all the work.

7.Still-Hurting Sally: First dates are notorious for spilling the beans on what went wrong with prior relationships. Sharing an amusing anecdote is good; making it clear you're not over your ex-boyfriend is a definite no-no.

8.Game Player Gina: "Maybe I'll kiss you goodnight, maybe I won't." Good guys like to know where they stand. They leave the game-playing for the sports field. There's nothing wrong with flirting, but just know when it crosses over into deception and confusion.

9.Conceited Colleen: "Any guy would be lucky to have me." Guess what, the great guy across the table is also a real catch. Stop assuming every guy doesn't deserve you, and then you'll be on your way to actually landing a good one.

10.Matrimony Maureen: He dips his egg roll in duck sauce when all of a sudden she spills the beans on what they should name their kids. Intense relationships can be exciting for a good guy, but walking down the aisle before you walk each other home for the first time is a turn-off.


Ever had any of these dates or do you believe one of these characters have been you? I wanna hear your dating horror stories!



3 comments:

WritingsForLife said...

cool advices and very nice blog, i must say :)
Cheers!

Lynda Lehmann said...

Interesting post. We all see ourselves and our spouses in there somewhere, I'm sure...lol...

Rolando said...

Haha, I dated a girl that broke all 10 turn off items and you even had one of them named after her.

Despite the turn offs, she was one beautiful girl. That infatuation didn't last long though.

Not sure if that was her way of playing hard to get, but she played it too hard. :)